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Why I'm calling Bullshit on the midlife 'crisis'

Updated: Oct 6, 2022

I’ve been reflecting on transitions A LOT over the past few of years. Those of you who come to my classes, retreats and trainings will know this is at the heart of my teaching.

Whether we like it or not, we’ve all been thrown in to a pot of significant change these past few years. Change isn't unusual, as we know it's ever present. What IS unusual is that all of us - right around the globe - are going through this seismic shift together, at the same time! Which is what makes it such an unusual, weird, difficult and brilliant human experiment.

And it doesn’t look like things are about to settle any time soon as people are feeling their way into this new and ever-changing landscape.

Here's what I learned in Baja....

Some of our transitions are personal and voluntary – maybe finally leaving that job or relationship. Others are external and involuntary (pandemic anyone?) And midlife is filled with more transitions than any other time of life. Perhaps it’s because we get clearer, or because life forces us to ‘clean up our act’ because shit just real people!

But here’s the thing. Our 40s, 50s and 60s are so rich with potential. By now we’ve grown enough wisdom to know what’s important and begun to get comfy in our own skin (just as it starts to sag, sigh!) The pleasure of not giving a fu@k arrives, just as collagen is leaving the building. Oh the irony! And yes, our sense of humour, humility, and emotional intelligence grows with age, too.

So here we are in this middle bit. With invitations come from left, right and centre to become something new (note, don’t be fooled by their clever disguise as ‘problems’ and ‘things not working out’).

The changes around us are situational, but transitions are psychological – even spiritual. You may no longer be structuring your life around your job, due to retirement, leaving or redundancy. That is a change. How you adapt to your new identity without that work or that fancy job title is a transition. Your children may not live in the house anymore. Yet, how you address this situation as an “empty nester” lies at the heart of a healthy—or not so healthy—transition.

So while some of the old ideas and structures we worked so hard to build fall away, let’s pause for a moment before we scramble to put back the pieces of the comfortable existence we once had. Maybe THIS is the invitation to uncover and discover something newer and truer.

So if things feel like they’ve been unravelling and quietly (or loudly) and falling apart at the seams, keep watching and waiting - it could be the start of something wonderful! This ‘midlife crisis’ could just be your ‘midlife calling’.

Hope to see you along the road! xx


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